A Sign

Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of
their car which said, "TWO PROSTITUTES.......$50.00."  A
policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they'd
either have to remove the sign or go to jail.

Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying,
"JESUS SAVES."

They asked the cop why he let the other car go and he said,
"Well, that's a little different, it pertains to religion."
So the two ladies took their sign down and took off.

The following day found the same cop in the area when he
noticed the two ladies driving around with a large sign on
their car again. Figuring he had an easy bust, he began to
catch up with them when he noticed the new sign which read..........
"TWO ANGELS SEEKING PETER.....$50.00."

Kawasaki

A businessman traveled to Japan to meet and play golf with
a few Japanese business associates.  Having nothing to do
the night before his game, he decided to solicit the services
of a prostitute.

Later, when they were in the throes of passion, she suddenly
screamed out "Kawasaki!" Not knowing the translation, he
figured it meant he was performing exceptionally well,
and so he kept going.

Again she screamed, "Kawasaki!  Kawasaki!" And again, he
smiled proudly at this congratulation and continued.

Finally, she shrieked "KAWASAKI!" a third time, jumped out
of bed and ran from the room. "Must have been too good for
her!" he thought to  himself, and went to sleep contented
with himself.

The next day, while in the middle of his round of golf, one
of his Japanese associates hit a perfect 6-iron off the tee
right into the cup for a hole-in-one!  Remembering his
new word and wanting to impress his associates with his
linguistic proficiency, the man yelled out "Kawasaki!"

Perplexed, the Japanese golfer turned to him and asked,
"What do you  mean, wrong hole?"

The Pill

A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is
losing interest in sex.  The doctor gives her a pill, but
warns her it is still experimental and tells her to slip it
into his mashed potatoes at dinner.

So, that night at dinner, she does.

About a week later she's back at the doctor. She says, "Doc,
the pill worked great!! I put it in the potatoes like you
said! It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes
all the food and dishes on the floor, grabs me, rips all my
clothes off and ravages me right there on the table!"

The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was
that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any
damages."

"Naah... ", she says, "that's okay. We aren't going back to
Denny's anyway."

"Christianity knows no truth which is not the child of love and the parent of duty. "

Phillips Brooks

A bag of fruit

Another day in class the teacher brought a bag full of fruit.
Now class, I'm going to reach into the bag and describe a
piece of fruit, and you tell what fruit I'm talking about."

"Okay, first:  it's round, plumb and red."

Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher,
wisely ignored him and picked Deborah,  who promptly answered
"An apple."

"No Deborah, it's a beet, but I like your thinking.

Now for the second. It's soft, fuzzy, and colored red and
brownish.

Well, Johnny is hopping up and down in his seat trying to get
the teacher to call on him.   But she skips him again and
calls on Billy.

Is it a peach?"

"No, Billy, I'm afraid it's a potato.  But I like your
thinking.

Here's another: it's long, yello, and fairly hard."

By now Johnny is about to explode as he waves his hand
frantically. The teacher skips him again and calls on Sally.

"A banana," she says.

"No," the teacher replies, "it's a squash, but I like your
thinking."

Johnny is kind of irritated now, so he speaks up loudly.

"Hey, I've got one for you teacher; let me put my hand in
my pocket.

Okay, I've got it:  it's round, hard, and it's got a head on
it."

"Johnny!" she cries.  "That's disgusting!"

"Nope," answers Johnny, "it's a quarter, but I like your
thinking!

"Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones. "

Phillips Brooks

Subject: Abe

An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a
phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink.  As the
bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party ?"

"Yeah," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed
as my love life."

"But you look like Abe Lincoln." protested the barkeep.

"That's right.  My last four scores were seven years ago."

"Thought creates character."

Annie Bessant

Subject: 200 dollars?!

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman
sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage,
he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Ummm,
would you mind if I chatted with you for awhile?"

She responds by yelling at the top of her lungs, "NO, I
WON'T SLEEP WITH YOU TONIGHT!" Everyone in the bar is now
staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and
completely embarrassed, and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and
apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I
embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in
psychology, and I'm studying how people respond to
embarrassing situations."

To which he responds at the top of his lungs,
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 200 DOLLARS?!!!"

"No man can tell whether he is rich or poor by turning to his ledger. It is the heart that makes a man rich. He is rich according to what he is, not according to what he has."

Henry Ward Beecher

Sex

I have serious problems when having sex.  Everytime I have sex,
my eyes start watering, I can't breathe, my heart rate goes
through the roof, my chest tightens, I go into convulsions, etc.
So, I go to the doctor to gets some answers to my unusual symptoms.
The doctor tells me my symptoms are due to the MACE.

"As diamond cuts diamond, and one hone smoothes a second, all the parts of intellect are whetstones to each other; and genius, which is but the result of their mutual sharpening, is character, too."

H. W. Bartol

"Character builds slowly, but it can be torn down with incredible swiftness. Faith Baldwin

A character standard is far more important than even a gold standard. The success of all economic systems is still dependent upon both righteous leaders and righteous people. In the last analysis, our national future depends upon our national character that is, whether it is spiritually or materially minded."

Roger Ward Babson

ReWriting Records????

Ha ha ha ...... In BolehLand, record can be 'changed'??? Ha ha ha ..........

 

------------------------------------------------

Nazri: Businessman never arrested over RM40mil

Hazlan Zakaria 6:37PM Oct 22, 2012

The Malaysian government now insists that Sabah businessman Michael Chia was never caught in Hong Kong, nor was Chia arrested by the former British colony’s anti-corruption authorities.

“According to the Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC), Michael Chia was never caught in Hong Kong.

“Hong Kong’s Independent Commission Against Corruption (ICAC) never arrested Michael Chia,” Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Mohd Nazri Abdul Aziz told the Dewan Rakyat today.

Nazri said the RM40 million seized from Chia (on right in picture above) and frozen was wired into an account and was not in the businessman’s possession as claimed by the opposition and reported in the media.

The de-facto law minister said this when winding up for the Prime Minister's Department during the committee stage of the Budget 2013 debate in the Dewan Rakyat today.

Money supposedly for Musa Aman

It has been reported that Chia was arrested with the cash in Hong Kong and the money was supposedly for Sabah Chief Minister Musa Aman. The money was allegedly payments to Musa from the Sabah timber industry.

Nazri said this in reply to questions from Opposition MPs who interjected during his speech and wanted him to clarify allegations that Chia was arrested with RM40 million in Singapore dollars and investigated for money laundering.

Earlier, Nazri said the Attorney-General's Chambers and the MACC had cooperated fully in the ICAC investigation, provided evidence and obtained testimonies as requested until the day the Hong Kong anti-graft body found Musa and Michael Chia were not involved in any corruption activity.

The charges were raised by Opposition MPs during the policy stage of the budget debate.

The MPs said the ICAC withdrew its investigations on money laundering against Chia because of no cooperation from the Attorney-General’s Chambers and the MACC which, dragged on the case for a far longer period than Hong Kong law allowed.

"Good habits are not made on birthdays, nor Christian character at the new year. The workshop of character is everyday life. The uneventful and commonplace hour is where the battle is lost or won." Maltbie Davenport Babcock,

"To enjoy the things we ought and to hate the things we ought has the greatest bearing on excellence of character." Aristotle

"Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in deserving them." Aristotle

"Such as are thy habitual thoughts, such also will be the character of thy soul?for the soul is dyed by the thoughts. Dye it then, with a continuous series of such thoughts as these?that where a man can live, there if he will, he can also live well." Marcus Antonius

"If you are not leaning, no one will let you down."

Dr. Robert Anthony

If your life is unselfish, if for others you live,

For not what you get, but how much you can give;

If you live close to God in his infinite grace?

You don?t have to tell it, it shows in your face."

Anonymous

The false, the deceit that you bear in your heart

Will not stay inside where it first got a start;

For sinew and blood are a thin veil of lace?

What you wear in your heart, you wear in your face.

"You don?t have to tell how you live each day,

You don?t have to say if you work or you play,

Attired, true barometer serves in the place,

However you life, it will show in your face.

The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to his or her commitment to excellence, regardless of his or chosen field of endeavor.

Zig Ziglar

"You can't measure the heart of a champion."

Anonymous

"You can tell what a man is by what he does when he hasn?t anything to do."

Anonymous

When small men begin to cast long shadows, it is a sure sign that the sun is setting."

Anonymous

"Though a man without money is poor, a man with nothing but money is still poorer. Worldly gifts cannot bear up the spirits from fainting and sinking when trials and troubles come, any more than headache can be cured by a golden crown or toothache by a chain of pearls."

Anonymous

"When I do right, no one remembers. When I do wrong, no one ever forgets."

Anonymous

"Reputation is what the world thinks a man is; character is what he really is."Anonymous

t Hopes or Wishful Thinking or Both??

The Rakyat of Malaysia, please 'do not disappoint' the PM, vote for anything but BN. Ha ha ha ha .....

---------------------------------------
Najib hopes for strong mandate in 13th GE

2:12PM Oct 6, 2012

Prime Minister Najib Razak hopes that he will be given a strong mandate in the upcoming 13th general election to continue to deliver to the people and make Malaysia a fully developed nation by 2020.

Najib, speaking in an interview with 'CNBC Conversation' hosted by renowned anchor Martin Soong that was aired on Astro CNBC (Channel 518) today, said the next five years were very crucial for the government to fulfill commitments and promises made by previous leaders to the nation.

"I'd like to have a strong mandate, Martin. Because to achieve our vision of a fully developed nation by 2020, the next five years would be very crucial. Crucial, because you're talking about the last lap.

"You're talking about going down the stretch and this is the most critical part because we really have to deliver, " he said.

Najib was responding to a question as to how important the upcoming election was for him and also the importance of receiving a fresh mandate especially in transforming Malaysia into a developed country by 2020.

He said the transformation was a firm commitment made by the then prime minister Dr Mahathir Mohamad in the early 90s with his (Najib's) predecessor Abdullah Ahmad Badawi implementing part of it, and now it was his turn to deliver to the people.

Redistributing income

To a question, Najib, who is also finance minister, agreed that achieving sustainable and inclusive economic growth without upsetting the political landscape too much was one the challenges Malaysia faced in becoming a developed nation.

However, he stressed that the key to make Malaysian society more equitable was to get growth to redistribute income back to the people.

"Without growth, it will be a lose-lose situation. So if we get five to six percent within the time frame, then we will able to at the same time, ensure a more fair and equitable distribution of wealth in this country.

In the 30-minute interview, Najib said the move (to get growth) was working and that the numbers were looking more positive in terms of bumiputera participation.

"...but it's not just about the equity numbers. We must also make sure that there is a fair distribution of income between the different levels of income groups in this country," he said.

- Bernama
  http://www.malaysiakini.com/news/210938

"Reputation is the shell a man discards when he leaves life for immortality. His character he takes with him."Anonymous

Or, am I a wrecker, who walks the town


Content with the labor of tearing down?"

Anonymous

'TAPSY' STEIFF VINTAGE OLD BEAR 1980-1982

VERY BEAUTIFUL ORIGINAL STEIFF BEAR IN VERY GOOD CONDITION!


DATE MANUFACTURED 1980-1982

SERIAL COLLECTION 6210/30

28 CM TALL COME WITH BUTTON AND YELLOW TAG

MADE IN GERMANY

Friend interested in selling and asking price USD120.00 exclude delivery charges

Item was sold off on 7 October 2012.

Ability can take you the top, but it takes character to keep you there.
Zig Ziglar

"I am building a character that shall never know completion.


May I, as the days come and go, ever draw nearer to God through service to His children."Anonymous

"Character is a victory, not a gift."Anonymous