Wednesday, July 22, 2009


The best adult jokes contest 2009 through cellphone texts/smses in U.S.A..

Grand Prize USD50,000.00

Newly wed girl told mom her husband is still a virgin.Mom asked "How do you know dear?"Girl replied "Last night, when we made love, his cock was still in plastic cover."

First Prize USD25,000.00Immigrant Worker: "Sir, me no come to work, me sick."Boss: " When I am sick, I have sex with my wife - try it."2 hours later, immigrant worker shows up at work:"Boss! It worked! Me ok now. You got nice house."

9 Consolation Prizes USD10,000.00 each

1. After sex, a newly-wed wife kept fondling her husband's cock.
Husband asked: "Why? Want to have sex again?"
Wife replied: "No dear, I just admiring your cock. I used to have one before."

2. Women's lives are hard.
Morning, wash clothes.
Noon, hang clothes.
Evening, keep clothes.
Nite, iron clothes.
Midnight, take off clothes.
After midnight, find clothes.

3. Priest lost his chicken and asked during mass: "Anyone got a cock?"
All men rose.
"I meant anyone seen a cock?"
All women rose.
"I mean anyone seen my cock?"
All nuns rose.

4. A Sad story
A woman's husband died and she had him cremated.
She then blew his ashes into the ocean and said,
"Sweetheart, this is my last blowjob for you."

5. Girl: "Mom what is a penis?"
Mom: "When you become a good girl, you will get one."
Girl: "But mom, what if I am not a good girl?"
Mom: "Then you will get many, dear!"

6. A lawyer who was confused in his mathematics asked his secretary:
"If I give you USD3 million less 17.5%, how much would you take off?"
Secretary: "Everything sir! Dress, Bra, Panties, Everything."

7. Schoolgirl: "I do not want to take the sex Education class."
Teacher: "Why?"
Schoolgirl: "Someone told me that the final exam will be Oral."

8. Two sperms talking on mobile phone.
Ist: "I'm somewhere between the fallopian tube and uterus. Are you close-by?"
2nd: "No boy, I am taking a different route. I am just crossing the tonsils."

9. Scientists have discovered that the lightest thing in the world is a penis.
This is because it can be lifted up even by just a simple thought.

Source unknown as sent by email by a friend

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

New Cheating Scam

Recieved this email from a friend...... please take note.

Hi Friends, this is worth your time reading , so real....!! Thanks CK for this alert... A few days ago, one of my friends received a sms with the message:You've strike 1st prize with a prize moneyof RMB 200,000 cash. The sms came with a contact no. My friend ignored itsince he had heard of too many bogus scamsusing similar tactics.

After a short while his handphone rang, a MissFang asked: "Sir have youreceived a sms telling you that you'vestrike 1st prize?"

My friend answered: "Yes, I have"

Miss Fang: "Please let us have your bank account number so that we can deposit the money into your account."

My friend thought, why not, let's see what you can do. My friend has a buddy who works in that bank. Hence, he gave her his accound number.

Ten minutes later, my friend's handphone started ringing again.

Miss Fang said: "Sir, we have deposited your prize money into youraccount, please check and verify."My friend checked using his handphone and found that RMB 200,000 was really deposited into his account. He was euphoric, just like that and he's RMB 200,000 richer!
30 minutes later, Miss Fang called again.

She was crying: "I'm sorry sir, I made a mistake, I forgot to deduct the tax before I deposited the prize money, 20% of RMB 200,000 equals to RMB40,000. Now the company wants me to reimburse the money.

Can you please return the RMB 40,000 tax? I beg you."

My friend thought for a while and felt pity for the lady. Thinking of the money in his bank account, he went to the bank.

Suddenly he thought of his buddy working in that bank and decided to askhis buddy to double check and confirm for him first.

Upon checking, his buddy found out that the money was deposited using a cheque of a different bank.

Even though the cheque was deposited but the actual amount of money can'tbe transfered into his account on the same day. If the other party decided to cancel the cheque, then he'll not get this RMB 200,000.

My friend was shocked. He almost lost RMB 40,000.

Before my friend left for home on that day, the cheque was actually cancelled. If not for his buddy, if not for him being a professional.or if he was scare of letting others know of striking the prize then this bogus scam would be successful. This is a true story, please beware.

Future scams could be even better planned. Please don't forget to forward to your friends and relatives to warn themfrom being cheated.

MANGOSTEEN (Garcinia mangostana)

MANGOSTEEN (Garcinia mangostana)

One of the Super Healthy Exotic Fruits The Mangosteen Fruit from Southwest Asia

The Mangosteen (Garcinia mangostana in Latin) plant is a tropical evergreen tree, believed to have originated in the Sunda Islands and the Moluccas. It was first discovered in Burma and Siam (now known as Thailand). The tree grows from 7 to 25 meters tall. This exotic edible Mangosteen fruit is a deep reddish purple when ripe. In Asia, the Mangosteen fruit is known as the "Queen of Fruits".

The Mangosteen tree requires a warm, very humid, equatorial climate all year round. Many people have tried to grow Garcinia mangostana in warm places such as California and Florida or in special greenhouses outside South East Asia, but they experienced little success because of the different environmental factors. The Mangosteen tree requires abundant moisture and only grows well in a tropical environment.

The Mangosteen fruit grown in Thailand is harvested in the season of optimum ripeness for maximum efficacy. The xanthone rich pericarp (the outer rind) is then separated from the pulp and freeze-dried.

The outer shell or rind of the Mangosteen fruit (called the pericarp) is rather hard, typically 4 to 6 centimeters in diameter, resembling a spherical, reddish-black, cartoon-style bomb. By cutting through the shell, one finds a very pale and fleshy fruit 3 to 5 centimeters in diameter. Depending on its size and ripeness, there may or may not be pits in the segments of the fruit. The number of fruit pods is directly related to the number of petals on the bottom of the shell. Commonly, the average Mangosteen will have 5 fruit pods.

The shell of the Mangosteen fruit looks tough and hard, but is easy to open. Care must be taken when opening the fruit, as the reddish-black husk outside produces a purplish, inky juice that stains fabric and can be almost impossible to remove (the reason why they are banned from some hotels in countries where they are available). To open a Mangosteen, the shell is usually broken apart, not cut. Holding the fruit in both hands, press it gently (thumbs on one side, the other fingers on the other) until the shell cracks. It is then very easy to pull the halves apart along the crack and remove the fruit without staining.

One of the most-praised of tropical fruits, and certainly the most-esteemed fruit in the family Guttiferae, the Mangosteen (Garcinia mangostana in Latin) is almost universally known or heard of by this name. But there are numerous variations in nomenclature: among Spanish-speaking people the fruit is called mangostan; to the French it is mangostanier, mangoustanier, mangouste or mangostier; in Portuguese it is mangostao, mangosta or mangusta; in Dutch it is manggis or manggistan; in Vietnamese it is mang cut; in Malaya it may be referred to in any of these languages or by the local terms mesetor, semetah, or sementah; and in the Philippines it is mangis or mangostan. Throughout the Malay Archipelago of Malaysia, there are many different spellings of names for Mangosteen similar to most of those mentioned above.

Health Benefits of Mangosteen Fruit (Garcinia mangostana)

Traditional Medicinal Uses:

For hundreds of years, the people of Southeast Asia have used the Mangosteen, especially the rind (called the pericarp, to ward off and treat infections, reduce pain or control fever, and treat various other ailments.

Dried Mangosteen fruits are shipped from Singapore to Calcutta and to China for medicinal use. The sliced and dried pericarp (rind) is powdered and administered to overcome dysentery. Made into an ointment, it is applied on eczema and other skin disorders.

The rind decoction is taken to relieve diarrhea and cystitis, gonorrhea and gleet, and is applied externally as an astringent lotion. A portion of the rind is steeped in water overnight and the infusion given as a remedy for chronic diarrhea in adults and children.

Filipinos employ a decoction of the leaves and bark as a febrifuge and to treat thrush, diarrhea, dysentery and urinary disorders.

In Malaya an infusion of the Mangosteen leaves, combined with unripe banana and a little benzoin, is applied to the wound of circumcision. A root decoction is taken to regulate female menstruation. A bark extract called amibiasine has been marketed for the treatment of amoebic dysentery.

Modern Medicinal Uses and Health Benefits:

The latest in scientific research shows Mangosteen contains a class of naturally occurring polyphenolic compounds known as xanthones. Xanthones provide beneficial effects on cardiovascular diseases, including ischemic heart disease, atherosclerosis, hypertension, and thrombosis. Xanthones demonstrate particularly powerful antioxidant properties. Xanthones are found in a limited number of rain forest plants, but nowhere are they found in greater abundance than in the rind of the Mangosteen fruit. The medicinal properties of the Mangosteen fruit are derived mainly from its outer rind or peel, not from the fleshy inner part of the fruit. The rind, called the pericarp, is where powerful antioxidants are highly concentrated. The Mangosteen pericarp is about a half-centimeter thick and is green when unripe, then dark purple when ripe.

These unique antioxidants, known as Xanthones, have properties which help to heal cells damaged by free radicals, slow aging, and ward off degenerative diseases and physical and mental deterioration. The rind of partially ripe Mangosteen fruit yields a polyhydroxy-xanthone derivative termed mangostin, also beta-mangostin. That of fully ripe fruits contains the xanthones gartanin, beta-disoxygartanin, and normangostin. According to research reported in professional journals such as Free Radical Research and the Journal of Pharmacology, these amazing Xanthones have a remarkablly beneficial effect on cardiovascular health. They are also naturally antibiotic, antiviral, and anti-inflammatory. Xanthones are among the most powerful antioxidants to be found in nature.

Many of the other health benefits of Xanthones from Mangosteen pericarp can be expressed in terms of how they act against or are "anti" various serious ailments...





anti-vertigo (dizziness),


anti-Parkinsonism (Parkinson's Disease),


anti-seborrheic (skin disease),

anti-glaucoma (eye disease),

anti-pyretic (anti-fever), anti-diarrhea,

anti-periodontic (gum disease),

anti-pain (such as dental pain),

anti-neuralgia (nerve pain),


anti-inflammatory (act as cox-2 inhibitors like the pharmaceutical drugs Vioxx(tm) and Celebrex(tm), but without the deadly side-effects), and

anti-ulcer (such as ulcers of the stomach, mouth, small bowel, or large bowel).

Some of the Xanthones in the Mangosteen pericarp have powerful anti-inflammatory properties which may be of interest to those who suffer the pain of sciatica and peripheray neuropathy, which cannot be effectively controlled by drug treatments. The amount of Mangosteen consumed per day may need to be increased by two or three times to support pain relief through its anti-inflammatory and cox-2 inhibitor effects.

Mangosteen fruit also shows vasorelaxant properties (causing dilation of blood vessels and increased blood flow).

With Mycobacterium tuberculosis (TB) and Staphylococcus aureus (Staph. A) bacteria, Mangosteen has shown inhibitory action against these harmful bacteria organisms. In addition to its antibacterial properties, Mangosteen fruit also demonstrates strong antifungal properties. It is highly effective in boosting weak immune systems.

There are several compounds found in the Mangosteen that appear to make this fruit so active as a nutritional component for the body.

Research and References NOTES: In the following citations of research studies, the medical term apoptosis refers to "cell death" after a cell has reproduced a certain number of times, then dies naturally (here, it refers to the death of cancer cells). Induction of apoptosis means "initiating apoptosis" of the cancer cells. HIV-1 refers to the AIDS virus. Low density lipoptrotein refers to "LDL cholesterol", the "bad cholesterol" that can form plaque in the arteries and increase the risk of heart disease or death by stroke or heart attack. Jiang, D.J. e. al. Pharmacological effects of xanthones as cardiovascular protective agents. Cardiovascular Drug Reviews, 2004, 22(2):91-102 Antiproliferation, antioxidation and induction of apoptosis by Garcinia mangostana on SKBR3 human breast cancer cell line. J. Ethnopharmacol, 2004 Jan:90(1):161-6 Induction of apoptosis by xanthones from mangosteen in human leukemia cell lines. J. Nat Prod. 2003 Aug;55(8):1124-7 Evaluation of the antifungal activity of natural xanthones from Garcinia mangostana and their synthetic derivatives. J. Nat Prod 1997 May; 60 (5):519-24 Active constituents against HIV-1 protease from Mangosteen. Planta Med 1996 Aug;62(4):381-2 Mangostin inhibits the oxidative modification of human low density lipoprotein. Free radical Research. 1995 Aug.:23(2):175-84

Monday, July 06, 2009

Scoring brownie points....

Just read the news below........... Can you all guest who is trying to score some brownie points for their own political mileages? The news are reported in mainstream newspaper.........

Lim making a mountain out of a molehill, says Gerakan
GEORGE TOWN: Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng’s reason for moving into a rented, luxury bungalow because his official residence is infested with termites and fire ants is a “flimsy excuse”, says Gerakan.
Its state Youth vice-chairman H’ng Khoon Leng said Lim was not being transparent on the location of his new residence, tenancy agreement, deposit or the bungalow’s renovation costs.
“If he can’t resolve minor problems plaguing Seri Teratai (Lim’s official residence), how can he govern Penang successfully?” he said in a statement yesterday.
He said Lim should make public the contents of his tenancy agreement, who paid for the renovation costs and when, and the date he was expected to move back to Seri Teratai.
“Lim (Guan Eng) must practise the principle of transparency as advocated by himself. On behalf of Penangites, we seek clarification directly from the Chief Minister.
“Why does he shun publicity on his new, rented, luxury home when he is the head of government and a public figure, and has always craved for publicity?
“His reason about the homeowner wanting privacy is very weak and odd,” he added.
On Saturday Lim’s press secretary Cheong Yin Fan had issued a statement announcing that the Chief Minister had moved out of Seri Teratai, which was found to be unsafe.
He said an inspection carried out by NLC General Pest Control (North) on June 29 had found termite infestation in the building and parts of the roof, as well as the dining hall ceiling, main entrance and the underground air well chamber.
Besides termites, Cheong said, forest ants had also been found.
Lim had appealed to the media not to publish where he was staying to fulfil the house owner’s request for privacy.
He had also instructed the State Secretary’s office and the Public Works Department to conduct a study into the treatment and repair works for Seri Teratai.
He moved into the residence, formerly known as Rumah Tetamu, on June 21, last year.
Lim has refuted claims that he was renovating the house, saying:
“I rented the house. On whether or not it is being renovated, you have to ask the owner.
“I’m sure she must have done some renovation after she bought the place and if she had renovated it, that is her prerogative,” he told reporters after attending the Penang Medical College conferring ceremony in Hotel Equatorial yesterday.
Lim added that the attacks from Gerakan Youth were “undeserving of comment” and declined to say any more on the issue.

What is the problem with this?

Ha ha ha..... jealous lah not invited to the karaoke sessions. Ha ha ha ha is this possible. Singing in the girls hostel at night.....

First if there is a karaoke machine in the hostel all the students in the school will know and secondly if the is karaoke singing at night the whole neighbourhood will know because of the noise. This is becos the hostel rooms are not sound proof and if you sing softly mana ada kick.

If I were the hostel warden if not invited sure make noiselah.... I do not think the warden and other girls are asleep at 9.00pm. If not sure complaint or join in lah.......

Something just defy logic........

PTA wants probe into karaoke-singing principal
PASIR PUTEH: Parents from a secondary school here want the authorities to probe claims that its principal has been holding karaoke sessions with female students at the girls’ hostel.
SM Tok Janggut Parent-Teacher Association chairman Datuk Mohd Jelani Jaafar said it had received numerous complaints on the matter, some of which were from the teachers themselves, and forwarded them to the district education office for further action.
He was commenting on reports that a female student was suspended from the hostel for a month after reporting the principal’s conduct to the school’s senior assistant for student affairs.
The student had claimed that she saw the principal frequenting the girls’ hostel between 9pm and 1am for karaoke sessions.
Mohd Jelani said that if the claims were true, it could tarnish the image of other principals and affect the students’ academic performance. — Bernama

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Adult Jokes

Adult Jokes

A judge asked a woman on why she wanted a divorce..
She answered, "Your Honor, he knew I'm a vegetarian and yet he still insists on putting his meat in my mouth."

Woman: "Doc, an ant entered my vagina, can you please take it out".
Doctor removes her panties and start making love.
Woman: "What are you doing?" Doctor: "This is the only way to drown the bastard!"

Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
Answer: Your SALARY. It comes once a month last 3 - 4 days & if it doesn't come you are in deep trouble!

A lady visited her doctor again, Dr. said: U look more sick & exhausted then before.
Are u having 3 meals a day as I advised?
Lady: WHAT? I thought U said 3 MALES a day!!!!

Women asked God to make The Penis Pretty.
GOD Said "No way; Now As It Is, The Penis is so ugly & U still Suck It.
If I make it Pretty You'll Eat It up!!

A nun went 4 a urine test.
The sample got mixed up.
When the doctor told her she was pregnant.
She cried n said, "Shit, we can't even trust cucumber anymore.!"

A boy pulls down his pants in front of a girl & asked " Do U have this? "
The girl lifted up her skirt & said, "
My mom said with this I can have a lot of THAT!"

Schoolgirl: "I do not want to take the SEX EDUCATION".
Class Teacher: " Why not?"
Schoolgirl: "Someone told me the FINAL EXAM would be ORAL!"

Mother asks daughter, how is married life? Daughter shyly says like BRITISH AIRWAYS. Mother reads the advertisement & is shocked. It says " 7 DAYS A WEEK,TWICE A DAY, BOTH WAYS!

What is the STRONGEST muscle?
TONGUE - It can raise a woman's hip with just one lick!. The lightest muscle?
PENIS! It can be raised by a woman's tongue!

Lady Immigration officer asked a Korean tourist: Name? Park Yu..
The 0fficer become angry & shouted back: FUCK YOU! Now what's your full name?
Korean replied: PARK YU TOO!!

Man to wife: Business is bad, if u learn how to cook we can remove servant.
Wife: ASSHOLE! If u learn how to fuck, we can remove driver, gardener & watchman...

COCK say to his two BALLS: I am going to take you with me to a party.
BALLS said: You big fucking liar.
You always get INSIDE and leave us waiting OUTSIDE!

A baby dog asked mama dog how papa look like?
Mama dog reply: How I know. Your papa came from behind & I didn't have chance to see his face" !

What's the difference between stress, tension & panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant, tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, PANIC is when both are pregnant!

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Fanatics or fighting for rights.....

Is Hindraf a bunch of fanatics? Maybe. I used to respect the Hindraf but after the Kampung Buah Pala incident, I just conclude that they are a bunch of fanatics and self centered inviduuals. Instead of understanding the nature of the problem, they chose a dispicable way to solve the problem. Looks like the gomen is right in banning the Hindraf.

Hindraf’s anti-DAP protest fizzles out
By Neville Spykerman
PETALING JAYA, June 30 – A planned protest by the Hindu Rights Action Force (Hindraf) at DAP’s headquarters here fizzled out after 10 minutes when police moved in to disperse the protestors.
The 15 Hindraf members who had gathered to demonstrate against the imminent demolition of the Kampung Buah Pala settlement in Penang were outnumbered by both journalists and police personnel.
Hindraf coordinator K.Selvam, who led the protest, said they wanted the DAP-led Penang Government to honour their election promises and save the home of the 200 Indian settlers.
Ipoh Barat MP M. Kulasegaran and Sungkai Assemblyman A. Sivanesan arrived shortly after most of the protesters had dispersed but had a showdown with police when they attempted to speak to the Hindraf members who were still on the scene.
Tempers flared as police instructed both the DAP elected representatives to disperse.
However, Sivanesan invited the Hindraf members and media into the party headquarters.
“The protesters were just airing their legitimate concerns and the DAP were ready to hear them out,” he said.
DAP stalwart Lim Kit Siang, who arrived later from Parliament said he had left instructions for all party leaders to meet the Hindraf supporters, who had also planned simultaneous protests at all DAP headquarters in all states.
He blamed the problem on the previous Penang Gerakan state government which had sold the 2.6 hectare land to a private developer, at RM10 a square foot.
Lim said the developer is planning to build 490 condominium units and had estimated the development value to be RM150 million, leaving the present state government to deal with the mess.