Battery Acid

Little Johnny's sitting on the street corner playin with battery acid, when a priest walked up and said, "Johnny, you should play with holy water instead." Little Johnny says, "Why is that?". The priest replies, "I put holy water on a pregnant lady and she passed a baby".

Little Johnny says to the priest, "That ain't sh*t. I put battery acid on a cat's ass and he passed a Volkswagon!"