Pirate Walks Into A Bar. So this pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. Confused, the bartender asks "Hey bud, why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"
"I don't know" the pirate says, "but it's driving me nuts!"
PS - why do they even call them pirates? You know, those Somali boat hijackers? They don't have wooden legs, they don't captain huge sailboats or have parrots on their shoulders. They're skinny little black men with AK-47's. Discuss.